On moving beyond the religion I was taught

"Even a child has the prudence to see that believers lose nothing if wrong, but unbelievers lose everything. . . . . But even a child can tell the difference between prudent pretense and genuine belief. Faith built on cost-benefit analysis is a conjurer's trick." ... Jim Corbett -- Goatwalking

"It was God who walked ahead, like a shepherd to the fold,

In his footsteps fared the weak and the weary and the old,

glad enough of gladness over, ready for the peace to be,

Yet the thing God had forgotten was the growing bones of me,

So I drew a bit apart and I lagged a bit behind

and I thought on peace eternal, lest he look into my mind,

I gazed upon the sky and I thought on heavenly rest,

and I slipped away like water through the fingers of the blessed..." Edna St. Vincent Millay -- Blue Flag in a Bog

Little by little what I thought came to be said in the books I found.